Coping With a Crisis

It seems pretty safe to say we are all in crisis mode right now. These days are difficult, that much is sure. Often we go through difficulties in private, but this is a strange, new shared trauma. The world is hurting. As we watch this pandemic unfold, as we mourn lives lost, we share this pain.

We are also individuals. Each of us has our own struggle and this crisis affects us all differently. How do we deal with the anxiety, the loss of loved ones, the loss of financial stability, and the loss of the future we once saw for ourselves?

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A Simple Way to Fight Stress

Keeping stress levels down in these modern lives of ours can be tricky. Technology has created a world where we’re expected to be within reach at all times. We’re always on the clock. The work culture in America also seems to discourage taking time off – so much so, that taking a vacation or a sick day can actually make you more stressed out.

In our personal lives, the standards of parenting sure seem a lot harsher than what I grew up with. As far as I remember, my childhood filled with hours upon hours of TV, sugary “juice” drinks and Kraft macaroni and cheese was a lot of fun. I survived.

My point is, there is so much pressure to give more and to be better, both at home and at work. When we internalize those external pressures, it’s easy to find yourself rundown by stress.

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Project Procrastination: Is it Time to Spend on That Big Home Improvement?

Spending money is the worst. It takes so much time and effort to make it, and then it all seems to slip away, spent on day to day necessities like food, shelter, or medical bills (literally the cost of living). Somehow, that home project you thought you’d tackle right away when bought your home hasn’t happened.

If it is not a necessity for living you might not want to make a big investment in a home project. It’s hard to commit when we’re measuring cost in thousands of dollars. When is it time to make these improvements a priority?

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Miscarriage and Picking Up the Pieces

“It feels like a toddler has rampaged on the LEGO structure of our lives.”

That’s what I just texted my husband, trying to explain how utterly destroyed everything feels right now.

Losing a pregnancy is obviously devastating. Physically, mentally, and financially, living through a miscarriage can be incredibly challenging. It hurts in a lot of ways I didn’t see coming. How do we move forward?

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Find Gratitude and Freedom from Want

I want to stop wanting.

This summer, I once again found myself getting insanely jealous of other people’s yards. Many friends on my social media feeds are, like me, parents of small children. I watch their kids playing in play houses or frolicking in sprinklers and I covet. I covet hard.

How nice would it be if we could go outside whenever we want without it becoming a whole big production? You want to give your kid everything and more, but the truth is there is always more to want.

Surely it’s more important to foster a sense of gratitude and contentment in your child, right? It starts with us. How do we teach ourselves to say this is enough? I am enough. What I have is enough.

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Potty Time! Excellent?

Potty training is a long and challenging endeavor. My son is 28 months old, and I had the feeling there wasn’t ever going to be a perfect time to do this.

When I was given a couple days off work, I decided to commit. I canceled my fun weekend plans and chose to spend that time solely focused on the bodily eliminations of the tiny human who lives in my house.

Every parent who has been through potty training has strong opinions. I received a lot of unsolicited advice (my favorite). As with most things, different approaches work for different kids. Here’s what has worked and here is what hasn’t – by all means, take it or leave it.

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The Secret to Organizing Your Messy Home

Take it from a formerly messy person, simplifying your surroundings is good for your mental health. There is nothing wrong with being messy. some of my best friends and close family members are messy people!

Observing my messy friends in their natural habitat led me to discover the easiest shortcut to a cleaner space. Once I put this new habit into practice in my own home, it became clear just how beneficial one small change could be.

Are you ready?

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Trying to Conceive: Five Reasons The Second Time is Worse

As I mentioned in my post, The Terrifying Prospect of Having Another Baby, my family is at a pivotal juncture. For so many reasons, trying to conceive for a second time has been a stick of emotional dynamite.

No doubt, dads experience some of this too, but honestly I’m writing this for my ladies out there. To the moms trying to conceive, I’m right here with you in crazy town. To anyone struggling with fertility issues, I can’t even begin to comprehend your strength.

Personally, it has been relatively easy for my to get pregnant in the past. I’m very lucky. That said, here are some reasons why even when it’s “easy,” it isn’t easy.

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The Unglamorous Truth About Self-Care

What if taking care of yourself isn’t all bubble baths and meditation? Self-care is a very popular concept at the moment. Like mindfulness and healthy living, renewed interest in these topics doesn’t mean these ideas are particularly new.

Our desire to be happy and healthy is obvious. There’s always a new diet, face cream, or workout to try. The idea of self-care certainly appeals to me as a mother. I often feel like I don’t have any time for myself. This turns me into a cranky asshole, which makes me feel like a bad mom, which then turns me into a very sad sack.

Pedicures and date nights would be amazing, but moms don’t have much time to focus on ourselves. Childcare is expensive. Time is valuable. Maybe practical self-care looks more like being a good mother to yourself?

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Experiments in Moderation

Does anyone out there do this well? Are there really people with an abundance of self-control? Are there people who can drink in moderation, eat in moderation, and even bitch in moderation? How do they do it? Aren’t these things life’s pleasures? They’re even more fun when you combine them all.

My lack of self-control is usually wine-centered. A glass or two at the end of the day sure hits the spot however, I’ve also seen the dark side of boozing far too many times in my life.

We want to to be genuine, we want to have integrity, and we want our behavior to line up with our beliefs. Maybe most of all, we want to feel in control of our own lives, to whatever extent that is possible.

Almost four months ago, I decided to try moderation for the first time. Here is what I learned…

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