As a child, I was an extremely picky eater. My sister was also very picky. I remember my mother often making three separate dinners: one for me, one for my sister, one for my dad. Sometimes she wouldn’t even eat any of the three diners that she prepared.
This is obviously bananas.
I also know from personal experience, as a kid and a mom, that forcing your child to clean their plate seems to just lead to more stress and power struggles.
How do we, as modern parents, fix the picky problem?
My poor mother’s solution was simple. She would sneak vegetables and other healthy ingredients into foods I already loved, namely Kraft Mac N’ Cheese and Top Ramen.
This brings us to our first strategy: elevate that shit.
If You Can’t Beat Them, Hide Broccoli Inside
One of my good friends has a little girl who loves her meat (my child is more about that bread life). Since she knows her daughter will always eat a turkey burger, she sneaks a little broccoli inside the patty. She gets extra points for this, because it’s pretty impossible to pick around.
Another way my mom friends and I sneak veggies in, is the beloved smoothie. It’s probably the only way your kid is going to eat kale or spinach. Yeah, it’s annoying to always have to clean the blender, but if it works, I’d say its worth it.
We recently upped our smoothie subterfuge by turning leftover smoothie into popsicles using these ice pop molds (which cost less than $2 at IKEA). Our kid thinks he’s getting a treat. We know he’s also getting some green goodness.
Accept Imperfection and Compromise
The sanctimommies out there will judge you for your doomsday supply of macaroni and cheese. They will judge you for your happy meal bag. Don’t let it bother you. They’re probably terribly unhappy on the inside, despite all that organic produce they’re getting.
Modern parenting seems to have a fuckton of rules that didn’t exist during our childhood. I was raised on an abundance of sugar, sodium, and television. You know what? I remember being pretty happy. People grow up and learn to like vegetables. It happens every day.
As my son became more and more picky about his food, I felt more and more like I was failing as a mother. It started to get to a point were he wasn’t even getting much fruit. Kids are supposed to love fruit! He would have been happy with crackers and milk and nothing else.
This lead to some serious poop problems. It’s not fun to watch your kid struggle to poop. Also, on a personal note, I need him to potty train. SOON. Something had to be done! Compromises would need to be made, so my baby wasn’t at the mercy of good old number two.
Cultivate Independence
My son has been able to open the refrigerator since he was a year old. We had a lot of issues with him standing with the refrigerator door wide open, asserting his dominance over our kitchen appliances.
I gave him his own shelf on the door, so he could grab his milk sippy whenever he wanted. He loved having some control and independence. He started closing the damn refrigerator door without being asked. Joy!
***Sidenote: If you don’t have this refrigerator problem, setting up a shelf or drawer somewhere in the kitchen with healthy snacks can be really beneficial. Toddlers have major control issues. Wouldn’t you?***
Fast-forward a year. My son is getting about five times the recommended amount of milk each day. He is a milkaholic.
It was time to tweak my strategy. We moved milk to the top shelf (where that delicious elixir of life belongs). Individually portioned healthy snacks like carrot sticks, cucumbers, and fruit were put in its place on the toddler shelf.
We’ve had limited success with the veggies. He has at least tried them a few times. I usually end up eating them, so at least I’m snacking healthy!
Healthy Snacking & Strategic Sugar
The biggest win came in beverage form. Right around the time my son’s milk addiction spiraled out of control, he stopped drinking water. Too much milk and not enough water were certainly not helping the constipation issues, so I did what I had to do.
I gave my kid access to…*dramatic tones*… juice. Yes, I give my son delicious sugar-smack disdained by modern parenting advice.
You know what? It’s helping. He can grab his juice sippy himself. He has dramatically increased his water intake. His cup has about three quarters water and one quarter pear juice (to keep things moving).
We’ve been able to cut down on milk and he is usually pooping once a day, which is much better than the way it used to be. He still loves crackers. He isn’t begging for more broccoli, but hooray for small victories.
The important thing is that everyone is trying. Having a relaxed attitude and patience seems to be the answer for most parenting problems. A lot of picky eaters grow into adults with perfectly reasonable eating habits. Until that happens, a spoonful of sugar can help the stress level go down.