Thank you cards – where do I begin? This little etiquette relic just can’t be left in the past. Why do thank you cards bother me? Being grateful and saying thanks are certainly wonderful things. So what is my problem?
When we got married, sending thank you cards for wedding presents seemed like the right thing to do. People buy you fine china or a trip to Hawaii, of course they deserve a formal thank you.
What about other occasions? I love getting thank you notes from my nieces and nephews who are learning to write. It’s great practice for both writing and gratitude. No one expects anything too verbose. Thank you, stick drawing, much too large and illegible signature… DONE. This interaction was very much worth it to me.
What if you’re an adult? Presumably, one that can read and write (Congrats! Those are important skills!). My other slight issue with this is that writing thank you cards is little bit gendered and that is stupid. I don’t want to be sexist, but have you ever received a thank you card from a man and you knew it was 100% his idea to write it?
Yeah, me too.
When I receive a thank you note from an adult, I often think, “That is so sweet!” That thought is quickly followed by, “Girl, you REALLY shouldn’t have.” I’ve moved on with my life and I want that for you too! I feel bad that you spent your precious time sending me this.
As a recipient, you read them, feel conflicted, then immediately throw them out. I’m all for being polite, but do we need this level of formality? Can’t I just say thank you in person or maybe *gasp* through text message?
All this thank you card hate is fresh in my mind. My son just had his first birthday. We received a lot of great gifts that we are super grateful for! If he’s entertained by his toys, he isn’t destroying our home. Seriously, thank you for helping to save our house from the wrath of my small child!
When we opened presents, my husband mentioned that we should keep a list of who got us what, so of course, I dutifully wrote down our inventory of gratitude. And then… nothing. The one-year-old isn’t writing those thank you cards. My husband isn’t writing those thank you cards. That is clearly one of my many jobs.
I’m still filled with quite a bit of post Mother’s Day self-righteousness, and I just have to say – PASS! No one is eagerly awaiting my thank you card. No one is thinking, “Gee, I really hope I get a letter from a grown-ass woman, that she wrote from the point of view of her baby, thanking me for that toy I got him. That would really round out my day.” I’m so grateful, but I’m also aware that there are better uses for everybody’s time.
I’d really like to find a way to be polite and gracious without conforming to these customs that I find out-dated and vaguely sexist. I mean, fuck Emily Post. Also, R.I.P.
Is my rant against this first-world problem annoying? Probably. Is this an issue worth getting all worked up about? Probably not. But what is the internet for, if not to let me go all Andy Rooney on the world?
Tune in next week for 2,000 words on why single use plastic is the devil.