It is here again – swimming pools, warm nights, the sounds of crickets outside your window, and… wedding season! This can be a busy time of year for those of us in our early thirties.
We have several weddings that we will be attending this year, so I’ve decided to be smart and plan ahead a little. It certainly couldn’t hurt! Our social calendar is almost entirely comprised of wedding season commitments.
I love other people’s weddings. It’s a great party. As long as you’re not one of the people getting married, there isn’t a lot of social pressure. Don’t wear white. Try not to cause a scene. Don’t sideways dive through the wedding cake like the music video for November Rain. That’s it.
It’s not a high bar… and sometimes there is an open bar!
I want to puke a little every time I see #myforeverweddingdate, but that is just my knee-jerk response to sentimentality. If I’m being honest, I like that part too. It is fun to get a little saucy and a little sauced with my husband. We dress up, eat, drink, dance, and enjoy our friends and family.
Sadly, all this fun isn’t exactly free.
Traveling to the Wedding
Luckily, most of the weddings we have this year are local. There will be some ubering, and sharing of said ubers.
Only one wedding will require substantial travel. We’ve decided to drive the distance in two shifts. This will help us avoid taking a very stubborn, very mobile, one-year-old on a plane. We will drive to my parents’ house, drop of the boy, then we will continue on to our beautiful weekend away. We’re staying in a rental home that we are sharing with friends.
Free childcare aside, this weekend will still cost some money. I’m compensating for this by viewing it as our big vacation/date night of the summer. The fact that two of our friends just happen to be getting married is a fun bonus. Your love is all about ME! Muahhaha.
Childcare
GRANDPARENTS, GRANDPARENTS, GRANDPARENTS
If you can abuse that source of free labor, by all means do it. Aunts and uncles work great too, even if you have to pay them back by watching your nieces or nephews.
For a wedding that the whole family is attending, we’re relying on a favor from a couple of friends who are still childless. We get two responsible, adult babysitters and they get a sneak peak at the horrors of parenting. It’s win-win!
Many people don’t have local family members. Some of you may have parents that are no longer with us, live too far away, or maybe shouldn’t be trusted with your beloved offspring. Hey, it happens.
If this applies to you, I’m going to let you in on a poorly kept secret. Nearly everyone who works with kids will babysit. I’ve been working in early childhood education for a decade. I can tell you, these people make very little money at their day jobs. (I could really go off about how preschool teachers should make more money, but this isn’t the time.) Ask that swim, soccer, or daycare teacher for their hourly rate. It’s probably pretty reasonable and you’ll have a babysitter with experience that you can trust.
Presents for the Bride and Groom
Wedding season is perhaps the sole reason for the existence of Crate & Barrel. By all means stick to the registry. People appreciate that, especially after paying $80 a head for mediocre food for their guests.
There are other options if you can’t find a good fit in your price range. If you can, give money. When we got married, every card we received with a few bills in it was greatly appreciated. I never once thought, “Well, this is gauche.” No. My thoughts were more like, “Fuck yeah! I fuckin’ love you! Thanks, so fucking much!” I’m honest and classy like that.
If you can’t afford to spend too much, a nice frame is a lovely gift. You can put a picture of the couple inside or leave it empty for future wedding photos.
Wedding Guest Dress
It seems like it has been hardwired into me that going to a wedding is the perfect excuse to buy a new dress. I know a lot of women who think like that.
The thing is, I have quite a few perfectly good wedding guest dresses in my closet. Many of them have only been worn once or twice. This year, I’ll be sporting my Greatest Hits collection. It’ll be hard not to buy something new, but I’m going to try.
How do you guys plan to survive this wedding season?